It's been less than two weeks since my job ended. For a few days I was content to sit around and decompress from my LVC year, but already the spare time has gotten to be too much. Here's how I am trying to fill it:

• Travel--in my first 6 weeks of unemployment I am taking 5 trips to 4 states.
  These past two weekends have been camping and houseboating trips with my family. Next is a WWOOF trip to Michigan, then a wedding in Iowa, and then a hiking trip to Idaho with Sam. It's nice to have the time for all of this!
• Job searching, sort of.
  I really needed a break from this, so I'm only pursuing this minimally for the next month until I'm back in town for good.
• Trying to figure out where on earth to put all of my stuff away at my parents' house.
• Cleaning out my bedroom and selling/replacing the furniture to make it more adultlike for me while I'm here and ready to be a guest room whenever I get to move out.
• Spending way too much time planning the wedding.
• Hanging out with lots of friends to keep me busy and keep my spirits high.
• Exercising every day when possible.
• Shopping, which is not a good idea when I don't have a job but is hard to resist after a year of scarcely purchasing anything.
• Starting some work for my mom's business.

Already it's easy to feel a little discouraged and useless knowing that this fall will likely involve a lot of hanging out at my parents' house without any permanent employment. It seems impractical to commit to a long-term volunteer or part-time position when I don't know what my schedule will be like if/when I find something full-time. Maybe it's time to rethink that.

Things I acquired today include:

• A Cub Foods receipt for $314.78
• The Mourner's Kaddish
• A small farewell gift from a resident
• The makings for cotton candy

It was most definitely a day.

Sooner or later, it always comes down to the dishes. Not since freshman year of college have I had a roommate with whom I didn't conflict somehow over dishes. Some roommates have believed that dishes should be washed the moment they are dirtied, to the point that the cookware is washed before the meal is even eaten. Another didn't see a need to do dishes for weeks at a time, though they sprawled across the counter (she didn't want them to be in the sink with ours) and she'd resort to using paper plates. I place myself in between these two extremes. I'm not bothered by dishes sitting for a day or two, but two weeks certainly crosses the line. I consider my viewpoint moderate, which doesn't sit too well with people positioned at either end of the dishes spectrum.

Sometimes dishes are an everyone-for-herself thing. Sometimes they're communal. I prefer the latter, because I think it's less petty, uses less water, and gets the dishes done more frequently. However, I've never had a communal-dishes agreement actually last the entire tenure of a living situation. Someone undoubtedly drops out without informing me. I do their dishes but they just stop doing mine. Usually I continue do theirs just to feel like I'm taking the high road.

Dishes are rarely just about dishes. Somehow dishes become the ultimate source for passive-aggressive expression of non-kitchen-sink-related feelings. I have one roommate who has long detested me for several reasons. Dishes are part of the issue, yes (she belongs to the wash-them-immediately camp and I'm just too relaxed to conform to her preferences very well) but far from the entire problem. However, the dislike and inability to comprehend each other are mutual, and all I can do is coexist with her as little as necessary until we move out in two weeks. She won't even acknowledge me when I walk into a room, so... whatever. I'm so done with her.

Despite the many years of frustration, tension, and effort with roommates, I still like having them... I think. However, the idea of having a place to myself for some months between LVC and marriage sounds pretty fun. I've never had an apartment all to myself, and it seems like something one should experience before moving in with a lifelong partner. Maybe for once I could completely let my guard down and feel safe in my home all of the time. I could do (and not do) the dishes whenever I damn well pleased!

The main challenge of moving anywhere but chez parents is, of course, affording it. Still next to no progress on the job search, though I do have a couple of contract/consulting positions to keep me occupied (and paid) for a month or two. Through an LVC alum I did find a promising apartment possiblity, but now I'm not so sure it's what I want. Pros: really cheap, furnished, flexible lease, good location, cute little place just for me. Cons: bedbugs. That alone is more than enough to keep me away with a thousand-foot pole unless the landlord can provide verification that they're gone for good, for sure, and that the furniture has been replaced. After spending the past year terrified of catching bedbugs from one of many properties I visit, there's no way I'll move into a house with them!

The stress of this week has caused me to lose sleep for the first time in a long time. Between ending a job (a busy end, no less), looking for a new one, ending my LVC year, preparing to move, being in a wedding, and planning my own wedding, it's just too much. This weekend I will attend both a wedding and a funeral, no less. But as stressed as I am right now, would I really want to fast-forward a few weeks? Then I'll be unemployed, my newlywed best friend will be living three states away, I'll be living with my parents, and I might be a little directionless. Maybe not such an awesome tradeoff.

Could it be that after 4 1/2 years of blissful blogging I am bored with it? Perhaps... we'll see if I get back into this, I guess. But I do feel inspired to document all of the wonderful, summertastic things that have happened since my last post. Life has been good!

Sam and I got engaged! We're excitedly planning a wedding for April, which has been so much fun. I wasn't sure I'd enjoy wedding planning, but I do so far. After all, a wedding is a great excuse to throw a beautiful party and celebrate a wonderful new stage of life surrounded by a community of loved ones.

Not only am I also preparing for Jenny's wedding (just 5 weeks away), but I've also got two cousins and an uncle who are all engaged, as well. Although this means a lot of weddingness, I haven't let it distract me from all of the other good things going on.

I've planted and tended my garden:

My roommate and I both did our first 5K together.

I've begun my post-LVC-job search in earnest and have an interview tomorrow!

I rode the Hiawatha Light Rail for the first time in my life--how did it take me so long to get around to it? But it was great and very accomodating to my bike.

My no-A/C-allowed house has been ridiculously hot this week; I've been sleeping in temperatures as high as 87 degrees!

My roommates and I threw a party, during which I realized that I am worse at beanbags than I recall.

I celebrated my birthday several times; the festivities included everything from getting engaged on vacation to having a long-overdue drink with an old friend.

My sister got back into the country and our out-of-town relatives suprised us by coming to the family barbeque!

Sam, his friend Tim, and I have taken some awesome boating excursions all over the Mississippi:

I'll never manage to have great beach/boat hair. Ever. But who cares? I'm pushing for our next adventure to be a camping trip on the river. Camping has been severely lacking so far this summer.

Summer in Minnesota is so wonderful. As much as I would jump at the chance to have a summer job like last year's (I dream about Hawaii all the time), this season is still treating me better than I could ever ask. (Even at work I get to spend a lot of time outside painting and landscaping with volunteers.) After a long winter it feels amazing to burst into so much life, excitement, adventure, and joy.

How long before I write another entry? Who knows...